Sage
She was my dog. I got her after college. It was too early. I wasn’t ready for such responsibility, but I wanted a dog. I wanted her.
As a puppy, she was my baby. We went everywhere together; to the bank, to the store, for rides in the car. She loved the car. The bank was her favorite stop. She always got a biscuit at the bank.
After the first year, my life changed. I had been working out of the house and I was able to hang out with her non-stop, but when I accepted a job that required an hour commute and frequent travel, my life was no longer conducive to having a dog. It wasn’t fair to her.
Luckily, my Dad would take her whenever I had to travel for business. He had an older Golden, Casey. They loved to wrestle and play and swim in the lake. They were best friends and Sage was always sad when I would pick her up. Eventually I decided she was happiest there.
My step-mother was home all day providing them with constant human companionship. They were both family members. So loved. So important to us.
Casey passed away in 2004 due to complications from an aggressive tumor he had on his back. He never showed that he was in pain, but the tumor was so big that it had to have affected his comfort. We were all devastated when he passed. And it was obvious that she was too. Sagie’s buddy was gone. She was so sad.
When my life changed again and I was no longer traveling, no longer renting, and settled in my own house, I considered taking Sage back. But my Dad, step-mother, and brother were so close to her. It wouldn’t have been fair to them. Despite not having Casey around, she was still happy as she could be curled up on the couch in the sun in the winter or digging a hole in the dirt under the bushes that line my Dad’s yard.
When my step-mother died suddenly last year, I worried about Sage being alone all day. But she always greeted me with the same energy; tail at full wag and squealing with joy. She loved hanging out on the hill by the garage watching my Dad and brother work on my brother’s car. Aside from the arthritis in her hips that gave her a hard time getting up when she’d been asleep for a while and made it difficult to navigate the hardwood floors at times, she was healthy and happy. And her same old self.
She hated the 4th of July. The fireworks always scared her. Thunderstorms too. More often than not my Dad or brother would come home to find a few lamps tipped over in the living room and a huddled mass of golden fur shaking in the bathtub. This year with the 4th looming and thunderstorm season upon us, she won’t have to be scared.
She passed away last night just before midnight in the company of my Dad and brother who loved her so much. She would’ve been 10 years old on Friday. I collapsed in tears this morning when I heard the news and couldn’t even fight them back long enough to drop Lyla off at daycare without getting 20 questions from her teachers as to why I was upset. I started thinking about why people like me attach themselves to animals and love them in ways we never thought imaginable. I think it’s because they can’t hurt us…
…until they’re gone.
And then it hurts like hell.
For those of you thinking, “It’s just a dog!”. (MOM!) You’re right. It is just a dog. But she was also a friend. And unconditional love giver who, on your worst day could make you smile when she rounded the corner with a green tennis ball/rope/squeaky toy stuffed in her mouth squealing with glee that you came to see her.
I love you forever, Sagie girl. I take comfort that you and Casey are running around wrestling, chasing squirrels, swimming, and playing tug-o-war together once again. You will be missed.
{{tears}} Awwww, she was a good dog! Loved her! I’m so sorry! She can chase my kitty Geebas around up there. {{HUGS}}
lilfootsmommy’s last blog post..Wildest Dreams
June 30th, 2009 | #
She wasn’t JUST a dog. Animals are like babies: they give love and just want it in return. No games to play, no conditions, just pure love and joy.
I’m so so sorry. The loss of a pet is hard, especially when other people may not understand. She had a great life and knew she was adored. Plus it sounds like she was spoiled rotten if I know you at all
She was beautiful. Again, I’m so sorry. (she can chase Irwin, Bert and Zach up there. Bert’s an easy target–he was deaf!)
samantha jo campen’s last blog post..Heavy heart
June 30th, 2009 | #
What a beautiful tribute. I know there are no words. I am sorry for your loss. {{hugs}}
kat’s last blog post..when life has you by the balls
June 30th, 2009 | #
you made me cry.
Miss you.
Hugs!!
June 30th, 2009 | #
She is gorgeous. And I’ve always had a soft spot for Goldens. Hopefully someday I’ll have one of my own. Sorry for your loss. I know the loss of a pet is crazy painful. HUGS!!!
krystyn’s last blog post..~tuesday randomness~
June 30th, 2009 | #
Animals are family. They’re never “just dogs” or “just cats.” I loved all of my pets and they really add a special something to families. They’re love is unconditional.
I’m so very sorry for your loss, hon. She’s up there with my Sammy dog!
June 30th, 2009 | #
Um, their love. Hi, way to go for poor grammar in my sentiments.
June 30th, 2009 | #
So sorry hon. There’s no such thing as “just” a dog. You loved her and she loved you back. Losing anybody – animal or human – is hard. Thinking of you.
dee’s last blog post..Four Years Goes Fast
June 30th, 2009 | #
SO sorry to hear that. My heart goes out to you and your family.
Robyn´s last blog ..Serenade
June 30th, 2009 | #
What a beautiful dog. So sorry for your loss. I don’t think you are crazy at all- I didn’t even know Sage and I’m sitting here bawling. I think you hit it right on the head- they don’t hurt us and they love us to death. Feel better.
Ann´s last blog ..First dip in a real pool
June 30th, 2009 | #
I’m so sorry for your loss. It’s never, ever easy. People who don’t love animals just don’t understand.
ccr in MA´s last blog ..The LOL comes along at last
June 30th, 2009 | #
I’m sorry. Not “just a dog”. Never just a dog when you really love them.
Michelle Smiles´s last blog ..Hint: See if it bounces
June 30th, 2009 | #
I’m totally sobbing on your behalf right now.
Dogs are not just dogs – they are perfect. They love you and listen and lick salty tears. They are always happy to see you even when you’re not happy to see yourself. i’m sorry you lost her today. Love you.
Cass´s last blog ..Dear Lexi: Month Eleven
June 30th, 2009 | #
Oh, that SUCKS! As someone who had to make The Decision with her beloved choclate fur child 8 months ago, I know how much it hurts when they’re gone. 8 months later and I still miss Baylee so much, my heart hurts.
They are so much more than “just dogs”. They don’t judge; they forgive instantly; they love us unconditionally.
Sage and Baylee are at the Rainbow Bridge together–running and swimming and napping in the sun.
Big hugs!
Kellie´s last blog ..A Puddle with a Side of Giggles.
July 1st, 2009 | #
Oh, I’m so sorry… she was a lovely dog! I love big dogs – they’re so comforting, and always good for hugs.
I’m glad that she has playmates to reunite with… you know all dogs go to heaven, right? (((hugs)))
bessie.viola´s last blog ..life lessons
July 1st, 2009 | #
*sigh* I am SO sorry for your loss. She was not just a dog, she was your friend. It’s okay to cry. Believe me. xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Kimberly´s last blog ..An Important Question
July 1st, 2009 | #
I’m sorry Aunt Ally! I didn’t meet Sage, but I’m sure she was AMAZING! If you loved her i know i would too!
I know she wasn’t JUST a dog she was a best friend, a sister, or anything you wanted her too be!!
<3 xoxo
July 2nd, 2009 | #
They are never “just” dogs…..she was a happy soul.
July 2nd, 2009 | #
Sigh. I miss my own Casey-pup. He hasn’t gone to the eternal romp in the sky yet but I had to leave him behind in my former life. I had no choice, for so many reasons. I know he’s well cared for there, even if I wasn’t. I miss those liquid brown eyes & the furious wag of his little tail-nubbin though.
Dawn´s last blog ..as irony would have it, i live in a place where it’s Summer eight out of every twelve months.
July 3rd, 2009 | #