Things You Might See if There’s Ever A Camera Put in My Car
(My commute has sucked and then blown this week. I have to keep myself busy. So here’s some things I do during my commute to keep myself entertained for the long and torturous ride.)
Someone playing air drums to a certain Phil Collins song ah-hem In The Air Tonight ah-hem.
(Does anyone else BLAST the volume when that part starts?)
Someone singing every piece of Funkytown – even the instrumentals. I’m partial to the ban-na-na’s rather than the do-do-doos.
Someone laughing hysterically while listening to everything that is totally inappropriate on The Howard Stern Show.
Someone cramming a Coffee Cake Muffin in her maw.
While simultaneously claiming she’s on a fruit and vegetable diet.
And cursing the Coffee Cake Muffin for being so crumby and getting on the seat. (He’s totally gonna know.)
Someone updating Twitter. (Shhh)
Someone whipping her hair around like a fool while listening to anything on the Hair Nation channel.
Someone substituting lyrics for non-words because she never bothered to learn the real lyrics. Worst offense: Bennie & The Jets
“Hey kids, take a blue together… spotlight didnd’t blah de balh nanan ana na WEATHER.”
(oh it gets worse)
Someone substituting lyrics for songs she knows the words to, but hers are better. Example, Nelson, Love & Affection.
“I can’t live without your love and erection.”
(That’s just low hanging fruit. HA! Another penis reference.)
And then giggling like a fool.
Someone occasionally leaving the baby’s favorite CD in the player and singing along to her favorite songs.
And then peering into the backseat and wishing someone was back there singing with her.
Someone who puts on the Love channel just to astonish herself with how many horrible ballad songs she knows.
Someone who puts on the 60’s channel just to astonish herself with how many awesome oldies she knows (this one’s totally my Dad’s fault).
Someone who yawns, stretches, and wishes she were back in bed.
And someone’s who’s grateful for having a commute to actually complain about.
You love and erection….HAHAHAHAHAHA! Seriously. Laughed out loud. So out loud my daughter asked me to keep it down so she could hear herself chewing.
Damn. I needed that laugh. Thank you
Kellie’s last blog post..Procrastination: It’s All the Rage
June 5th, 2009 | #
Wait. Air drums & blasting that part isn’t an automatic requirement of listening to “In the Air Tonight”??
Dawn’s last blog post..Grace in Small Things 132:365
June 5th, 2009 | #
anytime a phil song comes on, i have to bl;ast it, but especially that one!!!!
steph’s last blog post..Jacksonville Confidential: Walk of Shame Kit
June 6th, 2009 | #
I am so with you. I actually don’t mind the commute, even though sometimes it takes almost 1 hour and 30 minutes instead of 45. I switch from station to station so I can sing along, I have learned to apply makeup in stop and go traffic, while using a stick shift and I dance along to any song. Oh – my favorite past time: observing other drivers. The things you see. Amazing.
June 6th, 2009 | #
HA! Love this, and can totally picture it, as I know *someone* who may have many of the same behaviors, even though *her* commute is maybe half an hour at most.
bessie.viola’s last blog post..2 Timothy 4:7
June 8th, 2009 | #